I exist as I am, that is enough

I have been thinking a lot about Walt Whitman lately. It's my birthday this weekend,

and it's a "big" one, if one can be bigger then the next in more then just a numerical sense.

I suppose this has been as good a time as any to stop and ponder things, but besides this

let me back track a little here, besides my momentous birthday, this month has been filled with drama courtesy of my female siblings, so much drama in fact the only things missing were footlights, fake blood and straight guys in tights. (OK, I added straight guys in tights cause I'd like that, but you get the picture), and this was all on top of the Bead and Button Show which no matter how much fun I have it is a big energy suck preparing for, being at and coming down from it. So I have been pretty much feeling threadbare and fragmented or the last few weeks.

At this point in my life I have figured out a few things;

1: I am not going to please everyone. I am not motivated by other people opinions since I always seem to piss them off anyway You cannot be an artist by pleasing other people

2: At some point in your life you have to own your problems, fix them, move on and shut up.

3: Your friends will have your back

4: If you can't find beauty in dirt, then you will never see the real beauty in flowers. Anyway, back to Walt Whitman. Like I said I have been thinking about him and this bit from Leaves of Grass, in particular. I think it sums up everything beautifully.

I exist as I am, that is enough.

I exist as I am, that is enough

If no other world be aware I sit content

And if each and all be aware I sit content

One world is aware, and by far the largest to me,

And that is myself.

And whether I come to my own today or in ten thousand or ten million years

I can cheerfully take it now, or with equal cheerfulness,

I can wait

Walt Whitman

Leaves of Grass

happy birthday to me